Sometimes I convince myself that I can do EVERYTHING. Doesn't mean I am excellent at all of it at the same time, believe me, I am not... but I convince myself that I CAN do it all. And God knows I try. There are so many problems with that first statement... But I'll start with this.... just because I think I can do everything, doesn't mean I should drag everyone else with me. People need rest. People need to recharge their physical and emotional batteries. People need to see their families. People need sleep. I keep forgetting the last one.
In my enthusiasm for the perfectly balanced show, I forget that everyone does not run at my pace... which is a crazy pace. Sometimes a crazy stupid pace. I have to calm down. I see everything in my head and sometimes I can't communicate it fast enough or clearly enough for others to comprehend and put into action points. I keep thinking that MY vision IS everyone else's vision... and even though I may wish that to be the case....that is not true.
I don't want to burn the cast out... I don't want to burn the crew out... but I want the best show we can mount. Pace, rhythm, breathe... it always come back to that doesn't it... breathe out, breathe in. I have to slow down. I have to trust. I tell the cast that all the time...trust yourselves, the work is good... really good. Get your head to shut up.
Tech went really well yesterday. The set looks great..minimalistic - but everything is right on point. Two run thrus today. Pace, rhythm... breathe. I have to give everyone more slack. I think I have to give me more slack. Okay Jeanna... breathe.